TWLOHA
by madelyn09
Summary: This is in honor of To Write Love On Her Arms  TWLOHA . Ziva had a hard childhood and Kate helps her in coming to terms with it. It's got slight angst and comfort sex.  p.s. I suck a summaries.


**TWLOHA**

**A/N: So I wrote this in honor of TWLOHA (To Write Love On Her Arms, which is a non profit movement to bring awareness about self harm and also to give the people who have self harmed or are harming themselves hope. It lets those people know that they are not alone and we are here to help and love them.) Also I wrote this for my friend Just Another Tomboy who writes fabulously and you should all read her stuff. Slight angst and comfort sex! Enjoy :D**

Caitlin Todd was sitting on her couch, wrapped up in her girlfriend's arms, completely ignoring the movie playing in front of her. She couldn't even remember the title of the flick they had chosen to watch. The brunette was more concerned with the beautiful olive colored skin holding her tight. Leaning her head, Kate began to place a trail of sweet, wet kisses along the Israeli's arm.

"Someone is not interested in the movie that she picked." Ziva David said, looking down and watching her girlfriend decorate her arm with her lips.

"Not at all." Kate replied, readjusting her body so that she was expertly straddling the Israeli's hips. "My interests are in you." She whispered seductively, leaning down and kissing the soft skin on Ziva's neck.

"Mmmmm…." Ziva moaned, placing her hands on Kate's hips and holding them firmly.

And without warning, Ziva flung herself and Kate down swiftly onto the couch, her body now on top of the older woman's. Moving her lips down, Ziva softly connected the pair, leaving no space between the two women. The kiss started off loving and soft, but it quickly changed to rough, passionate, and lust filled. Their tongues battling for dominance, each wanting to take control. One of the Israeli's hands came up to hold Kate's face, her other running along the sides of the brunette's curves. Kate placed her hands on the woman's back, pushing their bodies closer together.

Ziva released the brunette's lips, moving down to kiss the soft skin of her neck. Kate's fingers had found their way to the hem of the Israeli's shirt, slipping them underneath to stroke the simple olive skin. Getting braver, Kate allowed her hands to travel up Ziva's beautifully sculpted abs, and forcefully grabbing the Israeli's breast through her bra.

Moaning at the sensation coursing through her body, Ziva pushed her hips deeper into Kate's, giving each woman an explosion of desire. Kate's hands came up and slowly she started to unbutton Ziva's top. Sliding it off of the Israeli's slender shoulders, and tossing it to the floor. Moving her fingers delicately over the olive skin, tracing invisible shapes on the flesh. Kate looked up, only to be met with soft chocolate eyes looking down onto her. Both women were wondering the same thing, _if they were ready_. Ready to take the next step closer. Ready to move forward into a more physical, more intimate relationship.

They had never gone this far before. There was always an unspoken agreement that they would wait to be physical with one another until both women were sure. Neither of them had been with another woman. They each had only been with men. And it was an intimidating experience to suddenly change what you've known and experienced for most of your life.

Looking deep into the hazel eyes of the woman below her, Ziva saw something that she had never seen in a lover's eyes. Love. Pure and simple love. And in that second, Ziva forgot everything. She forgot everything that had scared her and everything that had caused her to wait this long to be with Kate. And acting on the feelings running through her body, Ziva leant down taking control over Kate's lips. And the brunette allowed the other woman's tongue to roam over the curves and tastes of her mouth.

Pulling apart for a short second, Ziva removed Kate's shirt, marveling at the newly found skin. She treasured every new patch of flesh, every new delicate freckle. Slowly taking her time kissing, nipping and sucking on the beautiful soft skin. Kate groaned at the pleasure, loving the feel of Ziva's lips on her body. Sliding her fingers down, Kate began to play with the button on Ziva's jeans. Flicking it undone, the brunette slowly slid the zipper down, prepared to remove the clothing from the Israeli's body, but before she could, Ziva had pushed herself up separating her body from Kate's.

Kate looked at the woman, concern evident on her face, as Ziva spoke softly, "I am sorry Kate. I cannot do this."

Kate scooted over slightly, placing a comforting hand on Ziva's thigh, "It's fine, Ziva. I understand if you're not ready to move forward."

Meeting Kate's eyes, Ziva spoke honestly, "No, no it is not that. I would love to move forward with you Kate. I want to move forward with you. I just cannot."

"What do you mean you can't?" Kate asked softly.

Gently shaking her head, her blacken curls ruffling around her face, Ziva only replied, "I cannot."

Taking the Israeli's hand into her own, Kate quickly spoke, "Ziva, you can trust me. I know we've only been together for a few months, but I've fallen in love with you. I don't know how, and I don't know when, but I do know I have. You have my whole heart Ziva David. And I know I have yours. I can see it in your eyes."

Ziva just sat there and stared into the eyes of the woman she loved. She had never experienced anything like this. She had never felt anything like this. Ziva was a strong and independent woman that had taught herself to never show her weakness. And the woman lived by this rule, never falling to any person, but staying high and proud of whom she is, until she fell for Kate. With Kate, Ziva felt as if she wasn't perfect enough for the older woman. She felt ashamed and embarrassed about her own body and the marks that her past had left.

"Please trust me, Ziva. I would never purposely upset or hurt you. I love you." Kate simply stated, kissing the hand that she held.

Standing, Ziva moved across the room to where she was slightly in front of the other woman. Slipping her jeans off her narrow hips, she let the clothing fall down to the floor, revealing deep, red stained scars across her thighs. Each one carried multiple wounds, and each wound carried a story. Kate quietly gasped, not prepared to see the amount of pain Ziva had lived through. The Israeli stood still, running her palm over her scars, recalling each and every nightmare that had cause her to do this.

Ziva quietly began to speak, explaining what had happened to her as a child, "He was a hateful father. At age 8 I started my training for Mossad. I never got to finish my childhood. I never experienced the joys other children did."

Sadly studying the scars on her girlfriend's body, Kate asked, "Did he do that to you."

Ziva shook her head, "No. He never put an abusive hand on me, just abusive words into my ears. I did this to myself. I was 13 when I started and 17 before I was able to stop. I had no one there to help me and only a father who wanted perfection from me. It was the easiest way I knew how to let go. It was how I released the pain and disappointment."

A short silence passed between them before Ziva continued, "I was never good enough for him. Nothing I did ever pleased him. No matter how hard I worked, how long I tried, I was never good enough. And for the longest time I felt so much pain inside. I felt worthless and helpless and most of all lost. Cutting myself seemed to help erase those emotions."

Kate had formed tears in her eyes as she thought of the pain Ziva experienced, "Z honey, I'm so sorry you had to live with such a monster." Standing, Kate walked over and embraced Ziva, holding her tight.

Ziva collapsed in the embrace, bringing the both of them to the floor. And as Ziva started to sob, Kate held her close, protecting the Israeli as best as she could. The two women sat there for a long while as Ziva cried and released all the pain that she had been carrying for most of her life. As the sobs started to slow and the tears no longer ran, Kate continued to hold Ziva and whisper comforting things into her ears.

"Thank you." Ziva whispered softly.

Moving to look at the younger woman Kate said, "There is nothing to thank me for. I'm here for you Ziva. I always will be."

Overcome with the amount of love and care Kate was showing her, Ziva pressed her lips hard against the other woman's. Pushing their bodies close to one another, leaving no space in between them. The Israeli ran her fingers through the soft, dark waves of Kate's hair, gently but urgently kissing her. At first, Kate responded with the same passion and fire, until her logic started to come through.

Gently Kate separated herself from Ziva's lips, and breathlessly she spoke, "Ziva, we shouldn't. You're upset and you're not thinking straight. We need to slow down."

Ziva brought her hand up to cradle Kate's soft face as she whispered calmly, "Kate, I now know that I can trust you completely. I love you Caitlin Todd."

"And I love you Ziva David." Kate responded, leaning in for a soft and loving kiss.

Ziva reacted to the kiss, pushing their lips closer together. The Israeli opened her mouth slightly, running her tongue along the bottom of Kate's lips. Complying with what the woman wanted, Kate opened her mouth fully to Ziva. The two tongues dueled for dominance, both fighting for control over the kiss.

Breaking apart, Kate softly whispers, "Let me. Let me take care of you."

All Ziva could do was nod and lean back, offering her body to Kate, giving her complete control and complete trust. And removing her jeans, Kate gently climbed on top of the younger woman, starting to kiss her lips soundly until she slowly started to make her way down the beautiful skin. Making a trail of sweet kisses run down from the Israeli's neck to her chest. And gently removing the woman's bra, Kate carefully placed kisses all around the already hardened nipples. Sucking on the dark skin, and taking a nipple in between her lips.

"Ahh. Yes!" Ziva exclaimed, enjoying the work of Kate's lips sucking one her pink stubs.

Kate moved down the Israeli's body, lightly placing kisses across the woman's torso. A small moan escaped Ziva's lips as Kate's tongue swirled around her belly button. Reaching the woman's center, the brunette sweetly kissed the throbbing nerves through the wet lace. Moving further down, Kate was able to see clearly every scar Ziva had given herself. She saw every painful memory that Ziva lived through as a child.

Leaning down, Kate placed a soft kiss onto one of the scars and whispering, "You're beautiful, Z."

Going to the next scar she did the same to that one, placing a soft kiss and whispering, "You're perfect for me."

Continuing on, Kate did the same thing to every wound on Ziva's body, whispering soft words of love and care. _'I've never been happier than I am with you.' 'You'll always be good enough for me.' 'I'll never let you feel pain again.' 'You will forever be in my heart.' 'You'll never be lost again.' _And many more.

Looking up, Kate could see tears in Ziva's eyes. One lone drop had fallen, slowly sliding down the side of the Israeli's cheek. Kate came up and kissed the single tear away, then capturing Ziva's lips with her own. Kate could feel the heat and need that Ziva had gained for her, and slipping two of her long and slender fingers past the soaking piece of lace, and thrusting them into the younger woman's body. Ziva's lips broke free of Kate's as a gasped came from her lips, welcoming the invasion into her body.

Taking over Ziva's lips again, Kate continued to thrust her fingers into the Israeli's body. Ziva arched her forward, pushing her hips harder into the brunette's fingers. Ziva's hands scratched at Kate's back, pushing their bodies so close together, the only thing between them were Kate's fingers thrusting into Ziva's body.

Pushing her fingers in harder and faster, Kate could feel Ziva's orgasm start to build, and leaning down, she took a nipple into her mouth, sucking it firmly. Switching nipples and a few more hard thrusts and Ziva was sent over into her orgasm. Arching her body up, and pushing her hips into the other woman's, she yelled out Kate's name along with other obscenities.

Coming down from her sexual release, Kate held Ziva tight, kissing the Israeli's temple softly, and running her fingers through the thick black curls. Kate softly whispered sweet nothings into Ziva's ear.

Ziva turned her head slightly and kissed Kate onto the lips before standing and guiding Kate to the bedroom where the new lover's would get to know each other in a different, more fulfilling way.


End file.
